It was a tough weekend for Buckeye fans everywhere, and it's easy to become angry or to completely lose perspective. So in an effort to make things a little lighter Drew and I have cooked up a David Letterman style Top Ten List. Please understand that we are not trying to demean Terrelle or the coaching staff (we love the Buckeyes), but merely attempting to laugh away our frustrations. So, without further adieu, here are the "Top Ten Ways to Help Pryor Succeed":
# 10. Hire Dr. Buddy Rydell (a.k.a. Jack Nicholson) for "Anger Management" sessions.
# 10. Hire Dr. Buddy Rydell (a.k.a. Jack Nicholson) for "Anger Management" sessions.
# 9. Trade Nick Siciliano for a quarterback's coach to be named later.
# 8. Put a weight in Pryor's left shoe so he can't throw off his back foot.
# 8. Put a weight in Pryor's left shoe so he can't throw off his back foot.
# 7. Ban him from watching any more videos of Michael Vick.
# 6. Purchase the book "Coaching Offensive Lineman" (by Dave Christensen and James A. Peterson) for Jim Bollman.
# 5. Apply Stickum to Terrelle's left hand so he doesn't fumble...of course he'd have to learn to carry the ball in his left hand only. (For those of you who aren't as old as I am, Stickum was made famous by Lester Hayes, but banned by the NFL in 1981 after Hayes had 13 interceptions the previous season, the ball attaching itself to his hands like steel to a magnet).
# 4. Rehire Siciliano as Pryor's "personal helmet holder!" This way Pryor never forgets his helmet again!
# 3. Buy a pair of "Strength Shoes" for the wide receivers, so they can jump high enough to catch the elevated throws.
# 2. Make him spend an hour with Trev Alberts and Mark May for each interception he tosses.
And, drum roll please...
# 1. The Nuzzle! (Tress and TP need to learn to share some warm fuzzies like Meyer and Tebow)
# 6. Purchase the book "Coaching Offensive Lineman" (by Dave Christensen and James A. Peterson) for Jim Bollman.
# 5. Apply Stickum to Terrelle's left hand so he doesn't fumble...of course he'd have to learn to carry the ball in his left hand only. (For those of you who aren't as old as I am, Stickum was made famous by Lester Hayes, but banned by the NFL in 1981 after Hayes had 13 interceptions the previous season, the ball attaching itself to his hands like steel to a magnet).
# 4. Rehire Siciliano as Pryor's "personal helmet holder!" This way Pryor never forgets his helmet again!
# 3. Buy a pair of "Strength Shoes" for the wide receivers, so they can jump high enough to catch the elevated throws.
# 2. Make him spend an hour with Trev Alberts and Mark May for each interception he tosses.
And, drum roll please...
# 1. The Nuzzle! (Tress and TP need to learn to share some warm fuzzies like Meyer and Tebow)
Do you have any other suggestions? Send them our way and we'll be sure to email them straight to the Senator himself! Here's hoping we don't need another Top Ten List next week.
RSS Feed